Boundary Boss: The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen, and (Finally) Live Free
- Downloads：5480
- Type：Epub+TxT+PDF+Mobi
- Create Date：2021-08-30 06:40:57
- Update Date：2025-09-23
- Status：finish
- Author：Terri Cole
- ISBN：1683647688
- Environment：PC/Android/iPhone/iPad/Kindle
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Summary
Break Free From Over-Functioning， Over-Delivering， People-Pleasing， and Ignoring Your Own Needs So You Can Finally Live the Life You Deserve！
Most of us were never taught how to effectively express our preferences， desires or deal-breakers。 Instead， we hide our feelings behind passive-aggressive behavior， deny our own truths， or push our emotions down until we get depressed or so frustrated that we explode， potentially destroying hard-won trust and relationships。
The most successful and satisfied people on the planet have one thing in common: the ability to create and communicate clear， healthy boundaries。 This ability is， hands down， the biggest game changer when it comes to creating a healthy， happy， self-determined life。
In Boundary Boss， psychotherapist Terri Cole reveals a specific set of skills that can help you stop abandoning yourself for the sake of others （without guilt or drama） and get empowered to consciously take control of every aspect of your emotional， spiritual， physical， personal， and professional life。
Since becoming a Boundary Boss is a process， Cole also offers actionable strategies， scripts， and techniques that can be used in the moment， whenever you need them。 You will learn:
• How to recognize when your boundaries have been violated and what to do next
• How your unique “Boundary Blueprint” is unconsciously driving your boundary behaviors， and strategies to redesign it
• Powerful boundary scripts so in the moment you will know what to say
• How to manage “Boundary Destroyers”—including emotional manipulators， narcissists， and other toxic personalities
• Where you fall on the spectrum of codependency and how to create healthy， balanced relationships
This book is for women who are exhausted from over-giving， overdoing， and even over-feeling。 If you’re getting it all done but at the expense of yourself， give yourself the gift of Boundary Boss。
Most of us were never taught how to effectively express our preferences， desires or deal-breakers。 Instead， we hide our feelings behind passive-aggressive behavior， deny our own truths， or push our emotions down until we get depressed or so frustrated that we explode， potentially destroying hard-won trust and relationships。
The most successful and satisfied people on the planet have one thing in common: the ability to create and communicate clear， healthy boundaries。 This ability is， hands down， the biggest game changer when it comes to creating a healthy， happy， self-determined life。
In Boundary Boss， psychotherapist Terri Cole reveals a specific set of skills that can help you stop abandoning yourself for the sake of others （without guilt or drama） and get empowered to consciously take control of every aspect of your emotional， spiritual， physical， personal， and professional life。
Since becoming a Boundary Boss is a process， Cole also offers actionable strategies， scripts， and techniques that can be used in the moment， whenever you need them。 You will learn:
• How to recognize when your boundaries have been violated and what to do next
• How your unique “Boundary Blueprint” is unconsciously driving your boundary behaviors， and strategies to redesign it
• Powerful boundary scripts so in the moment you will know what to say
• How to manage “Boundary Destroyers”—including emotional manipulators， narcissists， and other toxic personalities
• Where you fall on the spectrum of codependency and how to create healthy， balanced relationships
This book is for women who are exhausted from over-giving， overdoing， and even over-feeling。 If you’re getting it all done but at the expense of yourself， give yourself the gift of Boundary Boss。
Reviews
Jill Schmieding
，
This is a MUST READ for everyone。 I think the people that don’t think they need to read this book， are indeed the reason this book was written， for them！ I wish I had this information as a child。 My adult life would be 100% different。 I presume I’d be happily married vs repeating unhealthy toxic cycles stemming from childhood trauma。 That said， Terri gives me hope。 Hope that I can change， hope that it’s not too late。 Hope that I am right where I need to be。 My journey to better boundaries and be This is a MUST READ for everyone。 I think the people that don’t think they need to read this book， are indeed the reason this book was written， for them！ I wish I had this information as a child。 My adult life would be 100% different。 I presume I’d be happily married vs repeating unhealthy toxic cycles stemming from childhood trauma。 That said， Terri gives me hope。 Hope that I can change， hope that it’s not too late。 Hope that I am right where I need to be。 My journey to better boundaries and believing I deserve better has been on going and this book is another tool in my tool box。 。。。more
ms Anisha
，
One of the most transformative books I’ve happily stumbled upon in years！ I was inspired to pick this book up after I listened to a podcast with the author being interviewed， that led me to taking her online Boundary Style quiz and man was it insightful。 Who knew my boundaries were so disordered！ I certainly didn’t！ The book provides a roadmap on setting firm boundaries to enable you to speak true to yourself （hello， people-pleaser alert！） and has practical activities you delve into through jour One of the most transformative books I’ve happily stumbled upon in years！ I was inspired to pick this book up after I listened to a podcast with the author being interviewed， that led me to taking her online Boundary Style quiz and man was it insightful。 Who knew my boundaries were so disordered！ I certainly didn’t！ The book provides a roadmap on setting firm boundaries to enable you to speak true to yourself （hello， people-pleaser alert！） and has practical activities you delve into through journaling， meditating etc to uncover crap hidden in the basement of your mind。 While some of the paragraphs were a bit too “girly” pep-talk， the content was still insightful and eye opening， This book came into my grasps during the cusp of a looming lockdown and I’ve been slowly working my way through it （not out of boredom by the way， more so to allow it all to sink in！） and re-evaluating all my relationships with a new lense。 。。。more
Carolanne
，
love， love， loved this book！！！ I think of myself as a pretty direct， no nonsese， "I don't tolerate bullshit terribly well" （to quote Bernie Sanders） type of person but even I struggle with the guilt & insecurities that our patriarchy， misogynistic society places on women and how it stifles our voices。 I was so inspired by this book that I instantly put in place some boundaries on people that needed them and felt SO much better！ This will be a life long work but I'm thankful I found this book to love， love， loved this book！！！ I think of myself as a pretty direct， no nonsese， "I don't tolerate bullshit terribly well" （to quote Bernie Sanders） type of person but even I struggle with the guilt & insecurities that our patriarchy， misogynistic society places on women and how it stifles our voices。 I was so inspired by this book that I instantly put in place some boundaries on people that needed them and felt SO much better！ This will be a life long work but I'm thankful I found this book to help guide me。 This book should be on the "to read" list of all women who want to work on themselves！ （Terri also notes that it is helpful to read this book while also seeking help from a therapist and I agree） As other reviewers have noted， most "self help" books are pretty fluffy but this one I found so practical and relatable with minimal fluff。 It has also helped me start to look at what boundaries people are setting up for themselves and to be better at honoring and respecting them- also a VERY good thing I listened to it on Audio and Terri did a great job reading it 。。。more
Rich Baker
，
Wow。 Like all works of stellar non-fiction， this book felt like it was written for me。I was a boundary disaster for a long time。 And even though I've come a long way， I'm still not a full on boundary boss。 This book is helping me to get there。Even the title alone 'boundary boss' gives me a new projection of myself to aim for that I didn't know of。 The book is filled with razor-sharp insight， moving stories， and piles of wisdom。 I'll definitely circle back to this book many times along my new jou Wow。 Like all works of stellar non-fiction， this book felt like it was written for me。I was a boundary disaster for a long time。 And even though I've come a long way， I'm still not a full on boundary boss。 This book is helping me to get there。Even the title alone 'boundary boss' gives me a new projection of myself to aim for that I didn't know of。 The book is filled with razor-sharp insight， moving stories， and piles of wisdom。 I'll definitely circle back to this book many times along my new journey。 I hope it helps you too。 =） 。。。more
MindOverMatter
，
I enjoyed reading this book。 The author is writing in a funny， engaging and encouraging way。 She is loving and compassionate while presenting very insightful and actionable content with lots of exercises。 I learned a great deal about boundaries （and I was already quite familiar with this topic before reading this book）。
Christine
，
Slowly worked through this book and implementing it bit by bit。 It's a great tool for practically applying boundaries and understanding why you're a boundary disaster。 Definitely recommend to anyone struggling with boundaries or even those working in fields where communication is needed， aka everybody ;） Slowly worked through this book and implementing it bit by bit。 It's a great tool for practically applying boundaries and understanding why you're a boundary disaster。 Definitely recommend to anyone struggling with boundaries or even those working in fields where communication is needed， aka everybody ;） 。。。more
Nikki
，
Boundary Boss: The Essential Guide to Talk True， Be Seen， and （Finally） Live Free by Terri ColePublisher: Sounds TrueGenre: Self-HelpPublication Date: April 20， 2021 Boundary Boss: The Essential Guide to Talk True， Be Seen， and （Finally） Live Free by Terri Cole is a self-help guide meant to help set boundaries。I found this to be a very interesting book and think I can use a lot of the suggestions in my life。 I would recommend taking your time when reading this book so you can actually do the sel Boundary Boss: The Essential Guide to Talk True， Be Seen， and （Finally） Live Free by Terri ColePublisher: Sounds TrueGenre: Self-HelpPublication Date: April 20， 2021 Boundary Boss: The Essential Guide to Talk True， Be Seen， and （Finally） Live Free by Terri Cole is a self-help guide meant to help set boundaries。I found this to be a very interesting book and think I can use a lot of the suggestions in my life。 I would recommend taking your time when reading this book so you can actually do the self-reflection and work suggested。I'm so grateful to Terri Cole， Sounds True， and NetGalley for providing me with a free copy of this ARC ebook in exchange for my honest review。 。。。more
Kipahni
，
I was shocked how much I needed this book。 As a person with rigid boundaries， I thought I was the bitch'nest of all boundary setters。 Turns out rigid boundaries are not good either。 This book has great exercises on how to implement boundaries and practice them。 I was shocked how much I needed this book。 As a person with rigid boundaries， I thought I was the bitch'nest of all boundary setters。 Turns out rigid boundaries are not good either。 This book has great exercises on how to implement boundaries and practice them。 。。。more
Allison LaRochelle
，
Definite reread material。
Kathy
，
Saw an interview with her， and was motivated to buy the book。 I'm glad I did！ Saw an interview with her， and was motivated to buy the book。 I'm glad I did！ 。。。more
Niki Walters
，
This book is so fucking simple but at the same time I've never seen the necessary information compiled anywhere else。 It balances an honest look at self with others and helped me to feel into what I can stand for and how to speak it。 This book is so fucking simple but at the same time I've never seen the necessary information compiled anywhere else。 It balances an honest look at self with others and helped me to feel into what I can stand for and how to speak it。 。。。more
Shuang
，
Not your average boundary book。 Lots of examples and actionable suggestions！ Very empowering
Laura
，
A self-help book that actually gives practical instructions （even scripts） - hurrah！
Julianna
，
Highly recommend for people who struggle setting boundaries with others or themselves。
Danielle
，
The best book on boundaries ever！
Katherine
，
This book has changed my life。 Thank you Terri！
Mckinzie Kandel
，
This book was filled with actionable and tangible steps you can take。 I could have used less of the words 'lovey' and 'you got this girl' but otherwise， I liked it。 This book was filled with actionable and tangible steps you can take。 I could have used less of the words 'lovey' and 'you got this girl' but otherwise， I liked it。 。。。more
Maggie
，
This was wonderfully eye opening and empowering。 Although I listened to it， I'll definitely make sure that I do the bonus exercises at the end。 Narration is fantastic。 This was wonderfully eye opening and empowering。 Although I listened to it， I'll definitely make sure that I do the bonus exercises at the end。 Narration is fantastic。 。。。more
Tanzi
，
A must read for anyone who struggles with boundaries， Terri is compassionate and encouraging。 I loved listening to hear read the audio version！
Joanne Chang
，
Great advice on how to set boundaries， and what to say when you feel like you need to set a boundary
Kristen
，
Good book and great tools in the back。 I just found too simplistic and not enough real substance and not as clear laid out as times。 However， why I did pick this up is childhood issue in a household with a “boundary destroyer” and help for the present day for dealing with these same but amplified issues that are also affecting others。 The Boundary Destroyer chapter was SPOT ON， and I can tell she is a very good therapist。 However， I was hoping to walk away with more tools。 I was just hoping to c Good book and great tools in the back。 I just found too simplistic and not enough real substance and not as clear laid out as times。 However， why I did pick this up is childhood issue in a household with a “boundary destroyer” and help for the present day for dealing with these same but amplified issues that are also affecting others。 The Boundary Destroyer chapter was SPOT ON， and I can tell she is a very good therapist。 However， I was hoping to walk away with more tools。 I was just hoping to come away with more。 。。。more
Anne
，
Life changing for me。 Using Cole's guidelines， I've developed positive ways of stating my boundaries--my needs， desires， and deal breakers; people are listening， and responding positively themselves。 Win， win。 Life changing for me。 Using Cole's guidelines， I've developed positive ways of stating my boundaries--my needs， desires， and deal breakers; people are listening， and responding positively themselves。 Win， win。 。。。more
Lisa Smith
，
Equal to several useful sessions of therapy and definitely worth more than one read。
Elesha
，
Great book with practical advice。 Cole has a conversational writing style and her words offer strength and compassion。
Jen
，
This is a pretty good tool for teaching boundaries。 The author is no-nonsense and kind of street level gritty。 There is a lot of good help here。 However， some readers may find the cursing and “darlin” type language tiring。 My recommendation would be to not let that keep you from the helpful aspects of the book。 Author is also into meditation/new age。 That’s not for me， but the book was still helpful。 You really can take what’s helpful and leave the rest， as the author states at the beginning。
Stephanie Affinito
，
This week， I savored Boundary Boss by Terri Cole。 Normally， I am a pretty swift reader， but this book is FILLED with opportunities for self reflection and well， work， so I spent a luxurious amount of time reading it。 This book spoke directly to my heart and Terri Cole’s no-nonsense， conversational and heartful voice felt like I was having a conversation with a dear， and very real， friend。 I don’t have enough space to share what I’ve learned here， but here was my BIG take-away: Boundaries matter。 This week， I savored Boundary Boss by Terri Cole。 Normally， I am a pretty swift reader， but this book is FILLED with opportunities for self reflection and well， work， so I spent a luxurious amount of time reading it。 This book spoke directly to my heart and Terri Cole’s no-nonsense， conversational and heartful voice felt like I was having a conversation with a dear， and very real， friend。 I don’t have enough space to share what I’ve learned here， but here was my BIG take-away: Boundaries matter。 And most important， the boundaries we create for OURSELVES matter most。 In the past， I’ve put too much focus on the boundaries outside of my control， trying to change everything and everyone around me instead of doing the hard work inside my head and heart to truly change from within。 But after reading， I can’t go back and can feel a tangible shift in my energy for what’s to come。 I highly recommend everyone read this。 。。。more
Elizabeth Bean
，
After reading this book， I've realized that so many of us have boundary issues。 Very insightful and beautifully written。 After reading this book， I've realized that so many of us have boundary issues。 Very insightful and beautifully written。 。。。more
Megan Moir
，
Excellent， excellent book on boundaries。 I loved the authors no nonsense， straightforward style of writing。 The fact that she is a licensed psychotherapist in NYC shines through with her anecdotes about various patients that I found really helpful。 I believe I will re-read this book every 6 months for an internal boundary pep talk and tune up since I am very prone to loose boundaries in my life。 I would highly recommend adding this book to your self help library！
Rita Burton Pedersen
，
Excellent book that adds very healthy perspective on every relationship。 Just what I needed。
Lino Verde
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